Ironforge, Level 20

Dear Mr. Cliffbeard,

How’s business? I never received my novelty hunk of meat, so I’m assuming you’ve decided not to go with my previous proposal. I see now, it was a bad idea. Turns out, I can only manage a partial semi handstand and a quarter cartwheel.

I need to rebuild my fortune, so I’ve decided to sell wares of my own. I will pace tirelessly around the Ironforge Military Ward and sell seats. I will be the Seat Vendor. (I sell some meat as well, but primarily seats.) I look forward to being your “neighbor” and being Seat Vendor. I will feature the popular “Mutton Prop” (a sheep-shaped stool) and you’ve no doubt seen people sitting on my “Wild Hog Plank”. (wood board that smells of bacon) I have an idea for a “Roasted Pail”, but am stuck on making it comfortable. “Comfort is king at the Seat Vendor!”

If you ever get tired of walking all day, stop by and I’ll let you demo one of my seats. There’s nothing like resting your tush after a hard day. “We treat your rump like royalty!” Just give me a little wave when you want to take a quick sit.

I look forward to joining the Military Ward Merchants Association!
R. Pebblebottom, Seat Vendor

P.S. Do you carry Chicken-Fried Croc Steak Fingers? I hear they’re great!